14th April 2020
Dear Diary,

What do storytellers do to be remembered? They tell stories. But what if there is a lock down? Well, just go live on Facebook. I, too, began to think about how and what to tell. We had a couple of pre-recorded videos, long before there was any news of the quarantine, when we started the recordings, so I thought we should continue now, and a couple of the ‘winders’ were happy to join, so I cut and edited for long hours, and eventually uploaded to YouTube. At last, we are present there as well. Everyone is struggling to be seen and heard, but the have to be comfortable sitting in front of a camera. Because not everyone can Because not everyone can sit in front of a camera, many of my storytellers are struggling with this, even when we’re telling them live and if the TV crew comes to record, it’s enough to tip them out of their comfort zone.
But what about now, in this situation? I need something live, what should it be? If everyone streams live, I should too, but I only want to tell stories. That’s how I invented storytelling tournaments. Well, live streaming is an exciting thing, that’s for sure. At first, I wasn’t sure whether the viewers could actually see me and I felt pretty uncomfortable fooling around, but then the likes and heart emojis came flying and it was good. It’s so much better than just speaking to a camera. So I started holding storytelling tournaments every day and I got more and more feedback, comments, letters that the kids are really looking forward to the next show, they rewatch, replay the tournaments. I became the new TV Teddy. It was a good feeling. I decided not to stop, just take a break, because every day I have to work out a new tale, with a game, a rhyme, and this a full-time job in itself. As you all know, I also have to coordinate three children, and wash dishes, cook and wash dishes. But during the break, while Laci takes over the storytelling, I thought I would enhance the storytelling tournaments with pictures and tricks, so that it would be enjoyable to watch later, perhaps it could come in handy later as it became quite good material. Of course, it didn’t happen yet, and on a long weekend we didn’t do anything, but I haven’t given up on it yet.
Storytelling, meanwhile, has flooded the social network, everyone alive
 is telling stories, there are those who read stories, actors who tell stories and storytellers telling stories. Um, too many cooks spoil the broth; after a while the tale is lost, the storyteller is lost among the many live streams. At first, I was also happy to hear one or two of my storytellers more often, but I no longer have the patience to listen. I was glad that several of our Tekergő team members started telling stories and uploaded a couple of our videos on YouTube. I am still glad. Because it’s all good. Yet, I think online storytelling is a whole different world. While in personal face-to-face storytelling, you can look into the eye of the audience members, you can smile at them, you get immediate feedback, the camera won’t wink at you, no matter how funny you may be. And that’s only one side of the coin. It is hard enough persuading yourself, you sweat blood, you see your audience in the small green dot and you tell them stories, you do it, you tell a terrific story! After a while, nobody will watch it. Why? Because it will be boring. Why? Because it is not the words that make a video good, but from the visual effects. A totally different world. And this is where the arguments begin. Where is the limit? What fits into visual effects and what doesn’t? Because folklore is sacred and inviolable. That’s right, that’s what I think. However, I see the two worlds as very different, I don’t see the point of comparing them. My teaching philosophy is: create inner images, which is why we tell stories with live words. Did I mention that I love my job? (even though I’ve been unemployed for a long time.) I must admit, I miss the visual effects from online stories. I don’t feel guilty if I play with the story a little bit, if I add pictures, playfulness. It is good to discuss this, although I am sometimes surprised by some reasons given, nonetheless I accept them and I am glad that we get to know each other’s limits. I’m a person of extremes, who is open to many things, who utilizes the tale in quite a variety of ways, I use it many times as a tool, and I don’t feel that I’m stealing or depriving it of its power. Where is the limit? We storytellers ask each other more and more often and although there seems an outline in a middle ground, there are exceptions. Yes, I’m pretty much an exception too. But that’s me! If the dictatorship couldn’t mold me more than it has, it won’t any more as I get older. I adhere to the limitations within certain aspects because there, I agree with those limits. But I don’t set limits for myself.
 I’m in search of myself, do I have limits? It will turn out soon. Or not so soon? In any case, I am working on it. I tell-stories, edit,  tell stories live, in front of and behind the greenscreen. The love of my life built a clean studio around me, I have no idea how,  but I create in it with pleasure. Thanks!


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