9th June 2020
Dear Diary,
I thought that I was locked up, I believed I would lose everything, I imagined I cannot go anywhere and I will not survive! Then I realized, that was locked up already, and yet I survived. I was locked up in a country for 17 years, but I left and now I am locked up in a another country. I was an outcast there and here too. Nonetheless, I had a good time and survived. I was locked u pin a system, and now I am locked up again, in the same one. I am trapped between restrictions, the restrictions of society. I am stuffed in a box and moan about it, sometimes I accept it though. I am tied up in the obligations of marriage. I’m locked all the time! So what? Here’s the thing. Every confinement has its own key, it’s up to you whether you want to find it. Every confinement has its advantages. You just have to open your eyes and you will notice it. I like to open my eyes and find the beauty. So I don’t feel closed.
But I got locked up again, recently, and I really thought I was losing everything, everything I worked for, for many years. Luckily I didn’t have time to sulk for long, I frantically started looking for the key. Then I realized I didn’t need the key. I like being locked up. I love being locked up with my children. I love being locked up in my marriage. I like to be locked in the studio that Levente built around me so I wouldn’t feel locked up. I like to be locked up because I meet my storytelling peers more often. I like to be locked up because I can learn a lot of new things. I love being locked up because I’ve met a lot more people in the last two months than I could have otherwise. I love being locked up because I made it to Singapore, India, America. I like to be locked up because I made a lot of new acquaintances and friends. I like to tell stories online because new opportunities have opened up for me and I can give, even when locked up.